Shoulder is competing with face for center of interest. A slightly higher camera angle may help.Dropping the chin a bit would avoid the impression that you are looking directly up her nostrils.
Gary pretty much hit it on the nose... starting with the nose. Looking up anyone's nose is always a little eerie. Get the idea behind it, but bring it down just a little. Remember that with portraits the more square the shoulders are to the camera the more "male" the pose is. Not in all cases, it depends on the shoot. In this case, rotate her shoulder to the camera just a little more.
Try to bring a little more light into her right eye. Look up the classic lighting styles like rembrandt lighting. I can see the possible dramatic lighting style you are trying to achieve here, so if you can study the classic lighting styles a little more; you will be amazed at how incredible the results will be.
Overall, not a bad portrait at all. A great start. Hope you can take the recommendations and try again. Then post a new attempt.
Shoulder is competing with face for center of interest. A slightly higher camera angle may help.Dropping the chin a bit would avoid the impression that you are looking directly up her nostrils.
Gary pretty much hit it on the nose... starting with the nose. Looking up anyone's nose is always a little eerie. Get the idea behind it, but bring it down just a little. Remember that with portraits the more square the shoulders are to the camera the more "male" the pose is. Not in all cases, it depends on the shoot. In this case, rotate her shoulder to the camera just a little more.
Try to bring a little more light into her right eye. Look up the classic lighting styles like rembrandt lighting. I can see the possible dramatic lighting style you are trying to achieve here, so if you can study the classic lighting styles a little more; you will be amazed at how incredible the results will be.
Overall, not a bad portrait at all. A great start. Hope you can take the recommendations and try again. Then post a new attempt.