I feel like from a technical level, for me, this is looking fairly nice. However her eyes look a bit odd and the expression could be improved in future. I may also pick a different color umbrella if possible, although it may not be as "traditional", I feel like the shadows from the sticks are tricking my eye into think there is some CA there when I don't believe there is.

Agree with Tom, the model's expression kills this photo unfortunately. One eye is bigger (and brighter) than the other. I like the umbrella and background, I think this could be a great shot.