Sony Versus Canon: An AI Encounter

Sony Versus Canon: An AI Encounter

With AI being all the rage lately, I thought I would test run a plot generator story of Canon versus Sony. I put in some spicy adjectives and plotted the main storyline: the photographers cross paths at the Imagining USA Nikon booth, and I let AI write a plot that will have you both roaring with laughter and fuming with offense. Grab your popcorn, and enjoy a good laugh.

The Story

Canon was thinking about Sony again. Sony was a snobby artist with crisp eyes and vibrant brains. Canon walked over to the window and reflected on his technical surroundings. He had always loved nerdy Imagining USA with its naughty, nice Nikon booth. It was a place that encouraged his tendency to feel competitive.

Then, he saw something in the distance, or rather, someone. It was the snobby figure of Sony.

Canon gulped. He glanced at his own reflection. He was an elitist, detail-oriented, Red Bull drinker with pixelated eyes and unsharp brains. His friends saw him as a tense, tired techie. Once, he had even helped an amateur photographer cross the road. But not even an elitist person who had once helped an amateur photographer cross the road was prepared for what Sony had in store today.

Sticking with the theme of AI, I used Dall-e 2 to generate cartoons.

The drizzle rained like photographing dogs, making Canon sharp. Canon grabbed a pixelated R5 that had been strewn nearby; he massaged it with his fingers. As Canon stepped outside and Sony came closer, he could see the lovely glint in his eye. Sony glared with all the wrath of an expensive 7R. He said, in hushed tones: "I hate you and I want top sales."

Canon looked back even more sharply and still fingering the pixelated R5. "Sony, your sensor is subpar," he replied. They looked at each other with technical feelings, like two plastic ponies editing at a very loyal conference, which had jazz music playing in the background and two competitive uncles Photoshopping to the beat.

Canon studied Sony's crisp eyes and vibrant brains. Eventually, he took a deep breath. "I'm sorry," began Canon in apologetic tones, "but I don't feel the same way, and I never will. I just hate you Sony." Sony looked cliquish, his emotions raw, like a rough 7R.

Canon could actually hear Sony's emotions shatter into 8,590 pieces. Then, the snobby artist hurried away into the distance. Not even a drink of Red Bull would calm Canon's nerves tonight.

Conclusion

The holidays are made for a good laugh, and I hope I provided one for you today. I struggled desperately against the temptation to re-write the merciless description of the "pixelated" R5 (my camera) and laughed deliriously at the sensor low blow. Did you have a favorite line? If you want to give the plot generator a test-run yourself, input your favorite photography-related story prompts, and share your results in the comments below.

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9 Comments
Jan Steinman's picture

ROTFLMFAO! This is really special. Thanks for being brave — being a devoted Canon shooter and all: "The drizzle rained like photographing dogs, making Canon sharp."

Michelle VanTine's picture

Hahaha I'm glad one person got a kick out of it. I laugh SO SO SO hard when AI spit it out!

Jan Steinman's picture

Waaaay back before the Web, there were "newsgroups." Kinda like Reddit, but all via plain text in an email-like interface.

There was one particular obnoxious fellow on one of these newsgroups. He'd always be citing scripture to back his bad behaviour and calling people names.

I had a program called "markov3" that would take a chunk of text and spit out something that resembled it, by matching two consecutive words to come up with a third from the text, and repeating.

So, I wired that to the newsgroup, so that whenever this obnoxious fellow would post something, a newsgroup member called "Ms. Markov" would massage it via markov3, wait a random delay, and then spit it back out to the group.

It was surreal… he began getting into a heated argument with himself… :-)

Michelle VanTine's picture

Wow how fascinating!

Ivor Rackham's picture

This is hilarious. Glad to know that is writers won't be out of a job quite yet.

Michelle VanTine's picture

Im glad it made you laugh! Im glad we wont be either, although i was impressed with some of its clever alliterations. Happy New Year

Hans J. Nielsen's picture

That is one of the best article you had on your site, this year. Can't wait to see what the rest of 2023 will bring. 🙂
👍 for a good laugh.

Michelle VanTine's picture

Haha I felt like we all needed a little laugh after surviving 2022. Glad you enjoyed and happy new year!

Michelle VanTine's picture

I'll write something nerdily technical on my next one to amend for this!