How to Deal With an Unhappy Photo or Video Client

How to Deal With an Unhappy Photo or Video Client

It's going to happen. You're going to mess something up or you're going to get the impossible-to-please client. Knowing how to deal with the inevitable when it hits is key to preserving both your business and your sanity.

Did You Screw Up?

I was once hanging out with a colleague when he began regaling me with his struggles with an unhappy client, but it just seemed like something was off about his story. I looked at him and bluntly asked: "well, did you screw up?" He stared back at me, aghast at the abject blow to his ego, but slowly realizing my point. He had indeed screwed up, deciding to make the shoot a personal experiment and getting angry when the client bruised his ego by being upset, except the client had every right to be. They hired him on the expectation of receiving images that looked like his portfolio work, and while these shots were good, they looked nothing like that. If I order tofu and you bring me steak, I'm going to be upset, no matter how well you cooked it.

The first thing to do when you have an unhappy client is to be really honest with yourself. Did you screw up? If you did and you decide to make a stand anyway, you're going to do a lot of damage to your reputation. We all make mistakes, but humanizing ourselves in the aftermath of those mistakes with a bit of humility can go a long way. Remember, your goal in business is not to win the fight, it's to defuse the situation and leave the client satisfied. Having an ego and being defensive don't contribute to that goal.

Take Time, Be Calm.

Never respond when you're upset. The goal is to be measured, accommodating, and rational, and being upset undermines all of those. Step away from the keyboard for a bit or find a trusted friend to read over your responses objectively. 

Choose a More Personal Communication Medium and Listen.

Email, like the rest of the Internet, is cold. Phone calls and in-person meetings are real-time, and they provide a higher implicit expectation of empathy from each party. It's the same reason we don't talk about relationship matters via text message. Furthermore, the temporal immediacy of it allows you to legitimize the client's feelings without them being able to outmaneuver that. If you screwed up, acknowledge it and take responsibility. If you didn't, but they're still unsatisfied, acknowledge their feelings: "I'm sorry the portraits didn't turn out the way you had hoped; I can understand why that would be frustrating for you." That single sentence (I used a semi-colon so I could be all poignant and call it the single sentence) is incredibly powerful because it legitimizes the client's feelings and if they were expecting a fight, it completely outflanks that expectation, often opening the client up to reasonable negotiation and compromise. It's not much different than a personal relationship: most clients want to feel that they're being heard and their feelings are being taken seriously. Show them that they are.

The mistake people often make in conflict resolution is trying to argue feelings. In general, people are entitled to feel what they want. Let them. Don't tell them they're wrong. Instead, ask them why they feel a certain way and address that. If a client says they're unsatisfied because they only got 150 finished shots from their wedding, don't tell them they're wrong to feel that way. They're not. Feelings aren't right or wrong; they're just feelings. Information is right or wrong. Ask them why they feel unsatisfied by that. Gently remind them that the contract you discussed and signed stated they would receive 150 shots, but perhaps offer to sit down with them and choose another 20 they really love. By doing so, you've validated their concerns but still met them on a level where things can be discussed objectively. Lastly, remember that timeliness is a key to empathy. If you wait three days to respond to an angry customer, they're not going to feel like a priority. Take a moment to collect your thoughts and emotions, but be prompt. 

Now, as a side note, if it's an extreme case where you can tell the client is wholly unreasonable and you may need records of conversations, stick to email so you have written records. 

Happy clients smile more! It's science!

Be Prepared With a Proposed Solution.

If you simply look at the client and say, "well, what do you want?", one of three things is going to happen: they're going to misinterpret your tone as patronizing, they're going to say they want way more than you're prepared to offer, or they're going to think you have no idea what you're doing. None of these are the desired outcome: a balanced, fair solution. Remember, your client hired you because you're the expert, and that expectation carries over to resolving conflict as well. Having a reasonable solution will ensure that you're not taken advantage and also allows you to convey that you understand the client's frustration and their desires. 

Avoid the Conflict in the First Place.

Get to know your client and their expectations beforehand. Ask them what they like about your work and what drew them to it. If anything is out of sorts, you'll pick it up here and you'll be able to either lay out terms or refer them to someone who might be a better fit. When expectations are clear and bluntly articulated, there's less room for gray area that can come back to bite you. 

Know Your Limits and Have a Contract.

Don't confuse being empathetic and accommodating with being a doormat. There are people out there who will never be satisfied or who will feign dissatisfaction simply to try to get something for free. If you're been empathetic, objective, and accommodating and things still aren't going well, it's time to cut ties. How you choose to do so is up to you. Certainly, don't get nasty with them now; you've held the high road and you want to maintain that image. Some people are of the mind to offer a refund to preserve a business's reputation. I'm generally of the mind that there's a line between protecting a business reputation and asserting what's right, and the refund floats nebulously right around that line and is probably something that depends on the individual case. I've never had a customer demand a refund; the few issues I've had have been easily resolved with some understanding and a reasonable offer. One client even came back a month later to apologize and tell me I was right, then sent me three referrals for my kindness. Remember, kindness and empathy work on everyone, except for those they'll never work on. Be kind to everyone and always have a contract ready for the occasional times when that doesn't work. 

Alex Cooke's picture

Alex Cooke is a Cleveland-based portrait, events, and landscape photographer. He holds an M.S. in Applied Mathematics and a doctorate in Music Composition. He is also an avid equestrian.

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11 Comments

Great advice in any field, not just photography!

Thank you, Simon!

I don't agree with "be prepared with a proposed solution". I've spent a large number of years in customer service oriented roles and it's pretty rare that you come across an unreasonable person who wants "the world".
If you're in that face to face meeting and you've apologized sincerely, your next step is to say "how can I make this right?" Then you shut up, and listen. MOST people will generally ask for less than what you were willing to give. Whatever they ask for, give it to them if it's within your power and it makes sense AND if you confirm that if you do it, they'll be 100% happy. If they're not going to be 100% happy, then it's not worth doing it.
Your goal is to retain them as a client and also to get them to refer business to you in the future. Anything short of that and it's not really worth your time. Which brings me to the explanation of why having a proposed solution isn't the best idea (or perhaps shouldn't be the ONLY idea). What if you propose a measure which will only make them 75% happy? Will they come back as clients? Maybe. But probably not. Will they refer business to you? Maybe. But probably not. So how is just giving them something beneficial to them? To you? It's not. So why do it?
If you really want to impress them, give them a little something extra on top of whatever you offer. For instance, in your original consultation, if they wanted something but just couldn't afford it and it costs you little-to-nothing, throw it in if you think it'll take them from "yes, I'll come back to you" and/or "I'll refer to you" to "I would LOVE to come back to you" and/or "I will DEFINITELY refer to you". That little something extra should spark enthusiasm in your customer to return/refer.
Think about being in a restaurant where they screw up your order. If they replace it like you ask, then you've been inconvenienced, but they made things right. But if they replace it AND offer a free drink, appetizer, or dessert on your next visit, you're going to be pretty excited about coming back, right? Same concept.
Squash the problem and get them excited about returning (or referring).
After you've determined what will make them happy AND excited about coming back/referring, and you work out the details of whatever that is, check back in with them and say "I want to reiterate how sorry I am that this happened and I honestly appreciate you coming to me with this. We're all human and we all make mistakes. I see situations like this as opportunities to get better and I want to thank you for bringing this to me and giving me this opportunity to grow, and to ensure that you're 100% happy. Do you feel like if we do _______ and ________ (the extra thing you're throwing in), that you'd be 100% happy and come to me/refer to me in the future?" If yes, job done. If no, keep digging.

None of that precludes being prepared with a proposed solution. You can still do all you suggested, having entered the conversation with a pre-prepared solution.

Sure. Of course. But why bother? What's the chance that what you're prepared to offer is exactly what they want? That's the point of my lengthy diatribe; have the customer tell you exactly what will make them happy. And if you manage to hit the nail exactly on the head with what you were going to offer, what does it matter? You're going to do it anyway because that's what the customer wants. It's wasted effort, IMO, to come up with solutions.
But yeah, if it tickles your fancy to waste your time with solutions which are likely to miss the mark, go for it.

I mostly agree with your approach Jonathan. Still, coming prepared with a solution is essential in case your client does not actually know upfront what will make him happy. And if that's the case and you have nothing, then you'll end up as not knowing what you're doing in the client's mind. You lost.

I agree, ron fya. Being well prepared for a discussion with a client, especially an unhappy one, is never a waste of time.

I've had this happen and have found that a collaborative approach works incredibly well. Usually, it was simply a case of a customer being told over and over in the past "we'll do this for you" and never being asked what they wanted. In every case I've encountered, once I explained that my suggestions may not make them 100% happy, but that I was more than willing to help them figure out what would, they thoughtfully proposed a solution - and I then exceeded that solution. (we called it "do it, plus one" at the place I learned this)

I'm SO glad that I'm not the only one.

If I may add to this good article with another angle: Sometimes you didn't screw up, and clients are mad because they don't know what is good. You might have unsophisticated clients. Your images might be 100 times better than the previous two photographers they used. Like the woman who showed me 2 previous pro portraits that she hated from someone else. They were horrible. the lighting, the posing, the clothes, the yellow color balance from the office light, the wrong angle. My shot made her look fantastic, and she positively hated mine, too. I've learned that whether I have a crazy client, an unsophisticated client, etc.. it really WAS my fault because I didn't prep the client ahead of time. Now when I shoot I spend much time before hand agreeing to a mood board showing what the style will be like. Setting expectations. The client is paying and the client is right. But we both win with a good discussion ahead of time so we're both on the same page. It makes all the difference. Every online tutorial shows the photog doing interesting lighting and the model is always thrilled. It's not like that in the wild. I called a friend of mine who's a HUGE name you know, been a shooter forever. I asked if clients ever hated his stuff even though you know you hit a home run compared to what other photogs did in the past for the client. He said, "ABSOLUTELY. I had a CEO who hated my shots. It came down to us just agreeing to disagree.' Thanks for the good article Alex, it happens to everyone. :)

"they're unsatisfied because they only got 150 finished shots "

... I wish! ... I did a three day wedding ...Delivered 900 shots...

... They asked "how can we get more shots" ...