Wedding Couple Demands a Refund After Their Photographer Expresses Support for Black Lives Matter on Instagram

Wedding Couple Demands a Refund After Their Photographer Expresses Support for Black Lives Matter on Instagram

A wedding photographer has received a demand for a refund from a couple after she posted her support for the Black Lives Matter movement on social media. The couple claimed that they would be too embarrassed to have her photograph their big day.

According to Insider, Cincinnati-based photographer Shakira Rochelle had taken a deposit to shoot the wedding of a couple (who remain anonymous). After making a post to Instagram expressing her support of the Black Lives Matter movement, she received a message from the bride stating that they would be "embarrassed" to have her at the ceremony and now wanted a refund.

The text message explained that the couple could not “support anyone who is outspoken on matters that simply do not concern them, as well as someone that does not believe that ALL lives matter.”

Rochelle replied explaining that she would not return the nonrefundable deposit and implied that the money would be donated to a Black Lives Matter organization. She told reporters that she later gave $160 to the NAACP.

In response, Rochelle was informed that the couple’s attorney would be in touch, though given that there was a written contract, it seems unlikely that legal proceedings will go ahead.

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dean wilson's picture

Let me go out on the political limb and suggest the Wedding couple do not understand the phrase "Black Lives Matter" is not to the exclusion of all others (Blue, Pink, White, Suede, Green, Yellow...or any other color you feel like associating with), but that the lives of Blacks are no less important than any other color.

Of course I'm an old white dude that doesn't understand nuthing.

Matt Williams's picture

Yup! Everyone against the phrase seems to have inserted an invisible "only" in front of the words. Otherwise, there's no way you can think it excludes non-black people.

It also falsely suggests black lives don’t matter, based largely on lies and false narratives.

Black Lives Matter was founded on the basis Michael Brown was shot in the back with his hands up. Most BLM supporters continue to believe and propagate that founding lie.

In 2019 9 “unarmed” blacks were shot, in a nation of 300 million people. Most of those were clearly justified cases of self defense. The rest resulted in criminal charges.

This is the “evidence” behind the claims of white on black genocide. (Whites are murdered by blacks at exponentially higher rates than the inverse). I’m sure someone will be triggered by the facts.

Matt Williams's picture

you could have just written "I'm racist and have no idea what I'm talking about" - would've saved some time

love how unarmed is in quotes as if they.... weren't? Your comment is so full of shit I don't even know where I'd start.

Matt, how on earth you find bernies post racist? it's pure numbers and at that moment of history, black people are the most racist folks. After them are muslims. Sorry but it's definitely easier to find places where you can be killed / injured just because you came into wrong neighbourhood and your skin is white, rather than the opposite. Either in murica or the rest of the world.

Respond with numbers if you think they are incorrect. Don't just throw "racist" into a discussion. People like you are the reason "racist" has no true meaning anymore. It's completely hollowed out.

Matt Williams's picture

It's not my job to do research for you, especially when I know damn well it won't change anyone's mind.

Pierre Dasnoy's picture

Numbers then.
An unarmed person from the middle class walking in the street, is 3,5 times more likely to be injured killed by police in the usa, if he is black.
Enough said, I think.
Anyone not understanding that (even) black lives matter, is racist.

Yeah, numbers mean nothing without a source. I thought that was a given.

Well .... yes, someone claiming that the lives of one ethnicity are less worthy than others are indeed racist. Did you just found out about this today? Are you the last one to read this in a book or hear it in the news?

Someone asking for numbers and a source however, is not. That's just called debating.

I'm not disagreeing with you but the problem is, nobody owns the phrase and some individuals, on both "sides" of the issue treat it as "only" Black Lives Matter, as Matt suggests. I would totally embrace it, according to your explanation but how do I simultaneously distance myself from those who's actions indicate a disdain for the lives of police officers or the much larger number of black individuals, who died at the hands of non-policemen? To further complicate the matter, a segment of the Black Lives Matter organization gives the appearance of supporting the exclusivity of who's lives matter so, given their organization has the same name as the sentiment, how does one easily distinguish the two?

These are honest questions and similar to those I deal with all the time as a Christian, given the existence of reprehensible Christians and acts, supposedly done in the name of God.

I'm similarly handicapped by my age, race and gender. ;-)

Matt Williams's picture

I don't know anyone nor have I ever seen anyone on the "side" of BLM who believes that only black lives matter. If you ever go to a rally, they talk about people of all races and the crowd is full of diverse skin colors. I've been to a few and they're really just about equal rights and treatment and of course, police brutality.

Matt Williams's picture

um, that's about cops.

Police are not a race. They take their uniform off every night, no one knows they're cops without the uniform, and they can quit any time. There isn't even a comparison.

Somehow you think this is an example of people believing that only black lives matter?

Also, cops suck.

Lives are lives.
I do find it interesting, though, that you rightfully decry prejudice, in the form of racism, and yet demonstrate extreme prejudice against people who willfully put their lives in jeopardy, every day, to preserve your right to do so.
Again, please understand that I do believe that black lives matter; my niece, nephew, grandniece, grandnephew and daughter-in-law are all black and I love them very much.

Matt Williams's picture

lol except, as we are seeing, tons of police are NOT preserving anyone's constitutional rights, and are actually doing the opposite.

that's why they suck

and again, police are not a race. feel like that needs to be stressed, once again.

Tons? No. Well, maybe "literally" tons: at 180lbs/policeman, average, that would be eleven officers so, "tons" would be at least 22 officers. I can believe that. ;-)

Just so I understand, a young black man, seeing the problems of the world, including racism, deciding to do something about it, becomes a law enforcement officer. Does he "suck" too?

I haven't responded to your comment about police not being a race because it's irrelevant. Racism is a subset of prejudice and your insistence, no other prejudice matters, is ridiculous. Do you think prejudice against short people is less reprehensible than prejudice against people for being white, black, asian, hispanic, aboriginal, etc.? Do you think ugly people are subject to less prejudice than anyone for racism? How about LGBTQ people? Women? You seem to have a very myopic view of life. Maybe I just suck!? :-D

Matt Williams's picture

Again, every form of prejudice you mention are things that PEOPLE CANNOT CHANGE. A short person can't be tall when they get home at night. A gay person can't choose to be straight.

A cop is a cop by choice, and the only "prejudice" they receive is when they are wearing a uniform - otherwise no one knows they're a cop, unless they choose to tell them.

They have a CHOICE to be what they are.

That's fundamentally and categorically different than literally every other example you have given.

Ahh, I see. So it's okay to discriminate against people for their choices but not their physical attributes? I'm really having a difficult time understanding your criteria and, more importantly, their practical ramifications.

Matt Williams's picture

Depends on the choice.

If it's being a cop, then yeah, cuz they suck.

Okay. I think we've exhausted the potential of this discussion.

Carel van Huyssteen's picture

And who do you call if there are no cops? Cops do much more good than the few individuals who cause harm

Matt Williams's picture

You realize that defunding the police doesn't mean getting rid of law enforcement entirely right? It means dismantling the current system and replacing it with, preferably, multiple departments - most of whom would not be armed. In many countries, there are cops solely dedicated to traffic enforcement, and they're unarmed.

It's not unlike having a specialized department for, let's say... fires. In Brazil, the police are also firefighters. That sounds crazy to us. Well, our system sounds crazy to people in the UK or in New Zealand or [insert dozens of other countries].

Carel van Huyssteen's picture

BLM is loudly calling for dismantling the police force, defunding literally means removing funds, meaning less police officers and equipment.

There have been protests (small ones, not like in the US, but including looting) in my country. They were posting "protest rules and guidelines". They literally said things like: when you are white, don't talk to the press, direct them to black people. This is not about you, this is about black people - not mixed race, Asian or any other color. This is about black people. Your only job as a white person, is to shield and use your body to protect black people from assaults from the police". Probably those rules came from someone outside BLM, but people were sharing this and attending the protest, like it was the greatest thing ever.

My personal opinion about this is, when BLM started to feel the subtle protest and misconception that people feel that ALL live matters, they should have embraced that idea, that all lives matter and that all people come into contact with injustice or prejudice - whether in contact with police or not. Instead, I only see people stressing that it's only about black people. Even in countries where black people are not the largest group of people with another ethnic background or without any history of slavery. What I meant to say is that they had the opportunity to bring people together - especially the large significant crowd of people who are undecided or still in doubt for any reason or based on personal (bad) experience - but this polarisation is doing the opposite and BLM are now using the (somewhat understandable) semi-counter movement to fuel the idea of them being the ONLY victim. Just imagine being white, hispanic or Asian and struggling in life, bad luck, low income, living in a high crime area and you only see signs telling "Black Lives Matter". You don't need a degree in Psychology to know that's not going to turn out well.

Matthias Kirk's picture


"If A, then B"

"not A
Therefore not B"

is an obvious logical fallacy.

Same can be said about this:

Now we have:

"A matters !"

-But B also matters

"You're a racist".


"A matters !"

-But B also matters

"Yes, you're right. Let's walk in the streets together and ask for change."


Which part will bring people together, strengthening the message and which part will divide people even more?

Not the same thing because….

A = All lives matter
B= Black lives matter
C=Cops lives matter
D=[ Designated group ] lives matter

if A then B & C & D

if !B | !C | !D then !A

if B then A

if C then A

if D then A

B is FALSE, therefore A is FALSE.

That is to say, claiming “All lives matter,” is to ignore, and spit on, the truth we live in today. All lives cannot matter until Black lives matter.

If one wants A to be true, then one needs to make B & C & D true.

Saying B is true does NOT make A false.

Simple secondary education logic.

You're calling it "not the same thing", but you're throwing in 3 extra groups of people....
And first you go "secundary education logic" but you end with a purely subjective and emotional conclusion. That "all lives matter" is spitting on the truth. It is not. That is completely your overly defensive interpretation. Claiming all lives matter does not equal "black lives matter less". Nowhere.

Also... it's not math. It's emotion, it's respect That was my point. It's about including people, not excluding. You can't win sympathy and trust with EVERYBODY, if you cut yourself off and don't let anyone in. Basically fighting to get equal treatment and stop people from generalising and at the same time, showing signs and shouting out that all police are murderers - some even saying that all white people are racist in the core. And need to be silent and let black people talk. That's really something when I take public transport and I hear a non-white man calling a young girl in a skirt a whore. I mean, there are so many layers and so many dimensions, and now we have a movement going, but they insist it's only about black people and in one direction.
I believe this is a mistake. How would it hurt their cause if they included other races or even other victims of police brutality? Or acknowledge white people getting killed by police? Or black killed by black? How exactly do you tell those parents, those children, those wives that they need to shout "black lives matter"? How will this convince people who are living it rough, while not being black? How will this connect with people who were a victim of black violence (surprise, it does exist!)?

Let's zoom in for a moment: "Your son was shot and killed by the police? But he's white, so don't be overly dramatic. The real problem is when black people are killed by the police". That's insanely rude and if it was the other way around, it would be accepted as insanely racist.

Also, I'm not really following your logic "not all lives matter until black live matter". What does this mean? How are black lives the key to making everybody's live matter? That makes no sense. It's a nice catchphrase, but it makes no sense when you're actually stressing that it's BLM and not all lives matter.

«…throwing in 3 extra groups of people....»
No! I am throwing in two extra groups of people, and the equations are the same IF one ignores them, but, I choose NOT to ignore any marginalised groups.

Ignore C & D, and we are back to one population, and one sub-group.

«…is spitting on the truth.»
Let me explain as simply as I can muster, (although I thought I already did).


We shout, “BLACK LIVES MATTER,” because, in practice, Black lives do not matter.

Therefore, when one claims boldly that, “All lives matter,” you are basically saying that what is happening to Black lives is a lie.


«…it's not math.»
One paragraph, [ ¶ 9 ] was not maths. It was English. No emotion. That is your narrative, and I am not buying.

«It's about including people, not excluding.»
And that is my point. Saying that “All lives matter,” in response to, “Black lives matter,” is to negate that Black lives are being treated as less than. Responding with, “ALM,” is claiming that the Black experience is a false narrative. Responding with, “ALM,” is excluding the Black experience from reality. “ALM”IS NOT INCLUSIVE!!!!!!

Shouting, “BLM,” does NOT exclude anyone! Their is nothing exclusive about the slogan. Look at the mathematical logic statements above, (or, English statements above, as this is also done in English comprehension at the secondary education level), and you will see that,
is NOT in any way exclusive of
A is TRUE,

Also, when I DID include two other groups, YOU complained!!!!! YOU COMPLAINED!!!! And now you ask…. Oh, please!

«…shouting out that all police are murderers…. …saying that all white people are racist….»
AGAIN, that is YOUR LYING NARRATIVE, and I am not buying! No one said that but you, and your ilk.

“Some police are murderers,” does NOT mean that, “All police are murderers.” That is the False narrative YOU want to spread about BLM. Again, I am not buying.

“Some Blacks do not trust all police,” is a narrative I will buy, because no one can tell a good cop from a bad cop simply by looking at them. They must interact with them first. If they are a bad cop, then an interaction is a VERY BAD idea for a Black person.

«…they insist it's only about black people…. …other victims of police brutality?»
From their website,
We affirm the lives of Black queer and trans folks, disabled folks, undocumented folks, folks with records, women, and all Black lives along the gender spectrum.
We affirm our humanity, our contributions to this society, and our resilience in the face of deadly oppression.
The fact that a bunch of Black people are fighting for Black dignity in no way means that they are ignoring others, and the statement, “We are working for a world where Black lives are no longer systematically targeted for demise,” is not any more inconsistent with that than a group of Chinese nationals in Japan fighting against Chinese oppression. Just because they fight against injustice towards Chinese people, does not mean that they care not for other injustices. Again, that is YOUR narrative, not theirs.

«…black killed by black?»
When those who INSIST on bringing up BoB crime start to quote statistics on WoW crime, come back to me. That is simply a white elephant, (on so many levels), and a red herring, and a straw man, all wrapped into one. BTW, CAPITALISE Black! That is racist!

«How exactly do you tell those parents, those children, those wives….»
Which ones? The White ones you did not mention? Oh! The Black ones! Simple. This is an issue about institutionalised racism. You are conflating several issues. You are saying that people in Florida ought not bother tying to get congress to do something about sea-level rise, because we have hurricanes to worry about.

Yes, there are hurricanes, but that does not mean that we ought to ignore sea-level rise. There are many other socio-political issues which affect Blacks, and even Whites, but that does NOT negate criminal acts by police against Blacks. Yes, some police have needlessly killed some White people, but that does NOT negate the FACT that they kill Black people in disproportionate numbers! Your arguments are quite racist, in that they continue to say, “Shut-up, Black people, about your issues with police discrimination, because we non-Blacks also have issues, so there!”

«…he's white, so don't be overly dramatic.»
Again, no one EVER said that, but YOU! That is YOUR NARRATIVE, and, again, I am NOT buying it. what you are still missing, which I apparently cannot reiterate enough, is the disproportionate ill-treatment of BIPOC by police.

«How are black lives the key….»
THEY ARE NOT the key! It is just FACTS and LOGIC. If All marbles are blue, then glass marbles are blue, and ceramic marbles are blue, and steel marbles are blue, and stone marbles are blue. If glass marbles are not blue, then ALL MARBLES CANNOT POSSIBLY be blue! It is THAT SIMPLE!!!!!

It makes perfect sense except to racists, and those who do not care enough to lend an ear to listen. Which camp are you? So far, you have made so many racist showings, I tend to think the former, but I will give you the benefit of the doubt, and presume that you have not really thought this out, but keep listening to the racist rhetoric of some of your companions.

All lives CANNOT matter if [ INSERT OPPRESSED GROUP HERE ] lives DOES NOT matter!!!

But is there really a difference between how POC and Whites are treated in this country? Absolutely! How do I know this? Because I pass at every chance I can get, and he who feels it knows it. If I spent too much time in the sun and get a dark tan, I am treated differently. When people see/hear my name, I get treated differently. When I wear a kurta or sherwani, I get treated differently.

No, it is not my personality. No, it is not my attitude. I get treated well when I pass. It is my appearance, and my name, even when they do not even get the chance to meet my charming personality, and caring attitude.

It makes perfect sense. You ought to take the time to look and listen.

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